the matador

so..lets talk about the matador.

first off, let me get the ball rolling by introducing our concurrent, brohavioural specimen. The matador is an ancient icon..most often a psychopath who doesn't have all the sandwiches in the picnic basket. This adventurous character may infact be a badass in general, but amongst this profile is the vehicular transport. This transportation mechanical device justifies that indeed the matador is a righteous dude who may possibly be carrying a sidearm or on steroids.

the average matador uses a mechanical device similar to this when going from point a to point b.

2. Although the matador may conduct primitive acts at times, the crowd seems to be dominated by women? What is going on? I thought most women were into animal rights.Wait..maybe these are tomboys or just really masculine badass types.

The front row seems to be mostly men. Judges or perhaps the matadors boyfriends.

3. Even though I tease and joke about the matador..it must be said that what they accomplish is pretty badass.

4. Don't show a drunken matador this...or any matador for that matter.

statistics

statistics are basically a bunch of numbers people and animals use to decipher characteristics, traits or other analysis' that describe mannerisms.

Not quite sure what that was all about.

Anyways, 1 in 20 people who come to this site are using Macintosh computers. What's up with that? Are Apple users a minority...or does this say that the 18 out of 20 people remaining after the other oddballs are smarter or dumber??

Also..

How come I have no third world viewers? Where are you third worlders? This is 2011 get with the program and start using this thing known as internets.

look at your naked feet

do it. Do you find it strange?

twitch your toes a little. Do a rhythmic movement. Make em' dance.


Well..I thought it was weird. Get messed up first- it might make it cooler.


-i hit backspace over 499 times while exploring, observing and learning the various nuances of my squirming, naked feet.

spoken word: a tough career

so you wanna be a spoken word dude huh? Got that beat flow Kerouac talked about? Ready to speak at a pace that seems illiterate? Not ready to rap with a beat?

Spoken word people always kinda frustrate me. I mean..yeah it's a talent.. I could do it if I wanted.. I used to freestyle to bad beats on cocaine induced diatribes when I was a teenager. But why?

You're competing against the best at spoken word of all time. You gonna beat Hitler in a spoken word match? I don't think so.

Hitler: the most successful spoken word artist of all time.

It's like trying to make the best British Invasion band of all time in 2011. Gonna call yourselves the Beetles and rip it? No. Are you gonna recruit Patrick Stewart and lay down your latest spoken word for him to read?

No. He has a great narrative over-voice. I'm not gonna deny that..but back to Hitler..imagine Patrick Stewart reading Mein Kampf on an audio book. That would automatically become the greatest selling spoken word item of all time.

Patrick Stewart is available since Morgan Freeman refuses to narrate Hate speech...sadly the best form of spoken word after comedy.

Hello. I am your narrator..between me and Patty Stew we have the bases covered. I do the political, endearing narratives, he handles the hate speech or sci fi characters.

Stop the spoken word. It's annoying and lame. I don't want serious diatribes about politics "spoken to me". Tell jokes man..I don't want to hear your serious crap...but yeah, you spoken word bums..err facsists, err poets...are busy and hard at it. Write it in a book for me..I'll read it if it is free and I get the time while I'm scratching my ass on a bus, subway, tram or some other form of public lamesportation.

Serious politically motivated spoken worders: FUCK OFF.

I lied earlier. Here without further ado, is the greatest spoken word performer of all time.

His barks are mindbending....