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Thursday, January 13, 2011

the limp handshake

i honestly don't fully get the whole aesthetic of the "firm handshake" so I just tend to keep it limp...perhaps like I'm a terminally ill patient in the hospital. Truth be told, I really just don't give a shit. If it's a job interview that I desperately need to do well in and the guy interviewing me is a big macho type, then yeah, I'll throw the acting skills out there and lay down a nice handshake that could potentially break fingers.


Shake it firm next time or I'll open a can of whoop ass you little PUNK

I wasn't being sexist in the last paragraph when I said "guy" interviewing me either. I know plenty of women who hold that role as well..but seriously- what kind of dumbass dude is gonna squeeze the shit out of the chicks hand who is interviewing them? Fucking morons...

But anyways, I'll continue this riveting tale.

I was recently made fun of and verbally abused for not giving a nice, firm handshake when I met a group of strangers (all guys) who I was hanging out with through a friend. None of them said shit, but then one just started going off:


"You can tell alot about a guys handshake."

Really? Is this a job site? And what is with the bluetooth headset? Quit pretending to be important and lose the act. Is he ready to beat some heads in Macho Man Randy Savage style? Almost got that BMW or whatever you're aiming for hotshot?

Seriously..I don't get this whole thing about firm handshakes. This isn't a military barracks, this isn't a try out for "who is the toughest asshole in the room"- lose the fucking macho bullshit. I'm limping it all the way to the finish line....and I don't give a shit what anybody says.
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3 comments:

  1. ThemanwiththegoldeneyeballJanuary 14, 2011 at 4:36 AM

    Hank Hill told me George Bush has a limp handshake.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The Bitcoin BrokerJanuary 14, 2011 at 10:10 AM

    I've got a firm handshake that could choke a bitch!

    ReplyDelete
  3. anon-o-mayseJanuary 16, 2011 at 10:59 PM

    In the business setting something as small as firm hand contact good mean the difference in how your first impression is perceived.

    ReplyDelete

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